My thoughts on dating, yes I said dating…

I was going to write about how life can be like walking through a deep muddy puddle but decided against that.  Oddly enough the effort to delve deep into self analysis was too much. Then I thought I would write about how some people are magnets for bad luck. I changed my mind because the person I was thinking of is on her way to an interview this morning and I want to send positive energy her way.

This all leaves me with nothing much to write about. So I thought I would write about something I know nothing about, dating.

My life is easy. I have a good home with lots of food and kind humans. I have plenty of dogs that I play with almost daily.  Love and affection is all around me.  I even have some real bromances and a few passionate relationships at the park.

it’s easy for dogs. A quick sniff and off we go.  Running playing and building a friendship.  It’s not so easy for humans.  I know of a few women who are thirty something and single.  They don’t want to be single but for many reasons they are.

Blondie and Baldy have been together for twenty years now. They met through a mutual friend and somehow even though they lived in different cities and didn’t have a car they managed not only to fall in love but to become best friends.  They have what can only be described as an organic relationship that just grows on it’s own accord.

I’m stating to realize that theirs is an uncommon situation.  I have a few human friends who are thirty something and are single.  They don’t want to be single but for whatever reason they just can’t find someone to share their lives with.  They are, from my perspective, attractive and intelligent women. One I’ve known now for over two years and despite her best efforts is lonely.

My first thought is that they had an unattainable “shopping list” of characteristics that their dream man must have.  It turns out that what they were looking for was just an ordinary guy.  There was no notion that he must have an incredible job or be in fantastic shape.  As one of the women said he just has to like animals and being outside with nature. In my books that’s not an unreasonable request.

I think the problem lies in how people date these days.  Once upon a time people relied on their social network, as in people you actually knew in real life who spent time with you and knew you as you truly were, not Facebook.  The prevalence of dating apps has in my opinion changed the dating game but not necessarily for the better.

There are lots of apparent positives using a dating app such as Plenty of Fish. Everyone is using it for the same reason and you can sort through thousands of potential dating partners by their interests and you can put forward your best face and have potential matches come to you.  The choices can be quite overwhelming.  I put myself in my friends position and got over seven hundred returns when searching men in our area.

That’s the problem seven hundred complete strangers with no context in which to make a choice.  Basically your profile is just part of the noise. I read a few pages of profiles both for men and women and honestly they all look the same. If we were to believe any of them the wold is full of easy going, fun loving caring folk. Just once I would like to see a profile that says the person is an uptight workaholic control freak.

Perhaps buy paying for the service like at E-Harmony you may increase the odds of finding someone compatible but I don’t know. My thinking is their algorithm does narrow the search but I doubt you would find many uptight people there either.

My advice to single people is join activity groups in your area. If you like running join a running club, if you like sewing find a group that sews.  Get to know your neighbors walk your dog at the park and talk to other dog walkers. Odds are eventually someone you meet will know someone who might be that someone special.

Me? I’m going to the park and I’m going to hump whoever is there. I’m a dog and I can do things like that.

Remember Buddy loves you

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